I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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