My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I looked at my own cervix.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
