he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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