Im at strip club and am horny
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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