Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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