so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
