Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize