they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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