I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
