I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
