Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize