The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
