some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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