he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
