How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize