you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
