Plan B is the new Plan A
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize