I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Randomize
