So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
