she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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