Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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