Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
