Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You need Xanax blowdarts
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
