Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
