she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
