Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
