If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
