well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
