3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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