i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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