"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize