So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We just shotgunned beers for America
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
