Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
