so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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