you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
So. Much. Porn.
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