Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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