sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
whose parrot is this?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
