It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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