Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
