And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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