The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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