Heybabeimwearingurpanties
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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