I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
