I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
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