I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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