Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize