At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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