possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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