STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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