Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
id be glad to
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
